Your Website - Spam from scam seo spammers Anderson SEO

Subject: Your Website
Sent By: Lexie
Sent Via Email Address: Lexie.Crinshaw@gmail.com
Determination: SEO company with no web site or phone number sent to a harvested Email Address. Can you say scamming scum bag? Avoid doing business with rip off companies and or spammers such as Anderson SEO.

Hello,
I know your website is important to you, and I was wondering if I could go over a few things. I work for a marketing company, and wanted to show some businesses, visually, how they compare to the websites on the first page -- Truly understand why your competition outranks you on the Search Engines.

We have been doing this for years and are great at what we do. We have an extremely knowledgeable staff that sincerely analyze your site; showing you exactly how to increase your rankings.

I'm asking for the opportunity to show you what I can do for your business before you pay a dime. I can do it in 10 to 15 minutes depending on your questions.

I need the best way to reach you and any comments you want me to consider before I do your research.

Thanks,

Lexie Crinshaw
Anderson SEO
P.O. Box 2653
Oceanside, CA 93472

To be removed from my list, send me an email with REMOVE as the subject

New nigerian scam

I am on the phone with them right now

Where are my car keys? Funny story

Where are my car keys?

Several days ago as I left a meeting at our church, I desperately gave myself a personal TSA pat down. I was looking for my

keys. They were not in my pockets. A quick search in the meeting room revealed nothing.

Suddenly I realized, I must have left them in the car. Frantically, I headed for the parking lot. My wife, Diane, has

scolded me many times for leaving the keys in the ignition. My theory is the ignition is the best place not to lose them.

Her theory is that the car will be stolen. As I burst through the doors of the church, I came to a terrifying conclusion.

Her theory was right. The parking lot was empty.

I immediately called the police. I gave them my location, confessed that I had left my keys in the car, and that it had been

stolen. Then I made the most difficult call of all, "Honey," I stammered. I always called her "honey" in times like these.

"I left my keys in the car, and it has been stolen."

There was a period of silence. I thought the call had been dropped, but then I heard Diane's voice. "Ken," she barked, "I

dropped you off!" Now it was my time to be silent. Embarrassed, I said, "Well, come and get me."

Diane retorted, "I will, as soon as I convince this policeman I have not stolen your car!"

How the Internet Got Started - Joke

In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com did take unto himself a young wife by the name of Dot. And Dot Com was a comely woman, broad of shoulder and long of leg. Indeed, she was often called Amazon Dot Com.

And she said unto Abraham, her husband, "Why dost thou travel so far from town to town with thy goods when thou canst trade without ever leaving thy tent?

And Abraham did look at her as though she were several saddle bags short of a camel load, but simply said, "How, dear?"

And Dot replied, "I will place drums in all the towns and drums in between to send messages saying what you have for sale, and they will reply telling you who hath the best price. And the sale can be made on the drums and delivery made by Uriah's Pony Stable (UPS)."

Abraham thought long and decided he would let Dot have her way with the drums. And the drums rang out and were an immediate success. Abraham sold all the goods he had at the top price, without ever having to move from his tent.

To prevent neighboring countries from overhearing what the drums were saying, Dot devised a system that only she and the drummers knew. It was known as Must Send Drum Over Sound (MSDOS), and she also developed a language to transmit ideas and pictures - Hebrew To The People (HTTP).

And the young men did take to Dot Com's trading as doth the greedy horsefly take to camel dung. They were called Nomadic Ecclesiastical Rich Dominican Sybarites, or NERDS.

And lo, the land was so feverish with joy at the new riches and the deafening sound of drums that no one noticed that the real riches were going to that enterprising drum dealer, Brother William of Gates, who bought off every drum maker in the land. And indeed did insist on drums to be made that would work only with Brother Gates' drumheads and drumsticks.

And Dot did say, "Oh, Abraham, what we have started is being taken over by others." And Abraham looked out over the Bay of Ezekiel, or eBay as it came to be known. He said, "We need a name that reflects what we are."

And Dot replied, "Young Ambitious Hebrew Owner Operators." "YAHOO," said Abraham. And because it was Dot's idea, they named it YAHOO Dot Com.

Abraham's cousin, Joshua, being the young Gregarious Energetic Educated Kid (GEEK) that he was, soon started using Dot's drums to locate things around the countryside. It soon became known as God's Own Official Guide to Locating Everything (GOOGLE).

That is how it all began. And that's the truth.

God, Adam, Eve, a Dog and a Cat

Adam and Eve said, 'Lord, when we were in the garden, you walked with us every day. Now we do not see you any more. We are lonesome here, and it is difficult for us to remember how much you love us.'

And God said, I will create a companion for you that will be with you and who will be a reflection of my love for you, so that you will love me even when you cannot see me. Regardless of how selfish or childish or unlovable you may be, this new companion will accept you as you are and will love you as I do, in spite of yourselves.'

And God created a new animal to be a companion for Adam and Eve.

And it was a good animal and God was pleased.

And the new animal was pleased to be with Adam and Eve and he wagged his tail.

And Adam said, 'Lord, I have already named all the animals in the Kingdom and I cannot think of a name for this new animal.'

And God said, 'I have created this new animal to be a reflection of my love for you, his name will be a reflection of my own name, and you will call him DOG.'

And Dog lived with Adam and Eve and was a companion to them and loved them.

And they were comforted.

And God was pleased.

And Dog was content and wagged his tail.

After a while, it came to pass that an angel came to the Lord and said, 'Lord, Adam and Eve have become filled with pride. They strut and preen like peacocks and they believe they are worthy of adoration. Dog has indeed taught them that they are loved, but perhaps too well.'

And God said, I will create for them a companion who will be with them and who will see them as they are. The companion will remind them of their limitations, so they will know that they are not always worthy of adoration.'

And God created CAT to be a companion to Adam and Eve.

And Cat would not obey them. And when Adam and Eve gazed into Cat's eyes, they were reminded that they were not the supreme beings.

And Adam and Eve learned humility.

And they were greatly improved.

And God was pleased.

And Dog was happy.

And Cat didn't give a shit one way or the other.

The Indian With One Testicle named One Stone

There once was an Indian who had only one testicle and whose given name was 'Onestone'.

He hated that name and asked everyone not to call him Onestone.

After years and years of torment, Onestone finally cracked and said,' If anyone calls me Onestone again I will kill them!'
The word got around and nobody called him that any more.

Then one day a young woman named Blue Bird forgot and said, 'Good morning, Onestone.'

He jumped up, grabbed her and took her deep into the forest where he made love to her all day and all night. He made love to her all the next

day, until Blue Bird died from exhaustion.

The word got around that Onestone meant what he promised he would do.

Years went by and no one dared call him by his given name until A woman named Yellow Bird returned to the village after being away.

Yellow Bird, who was Blue Bird's cousin, was overjoyed when she saw Onestone. She hugged him and said, 'Good to see you, Onestone.'

Onestone grabbed her, took her deep into the forest, then he made love to her all day, made love to her all night, made love to her all the next day, made love to her all the next night, but Yellow Bird wouldn't die!

Why??? OH, come on... take a guess! Everyone knows You can't kill Two Birds with OneStone!!!

Top Five Regrets of the Dying By Bronnie Ware

For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was

with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives. People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality.

I learned never to underestimate someone's capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as

expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed

though, every one of them. When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and

again. Here are the most common five:

1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how

many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people have had not honored even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to

choices they had made, or not made.


It is very important to try and honor at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late.

Health brings a freedom very few realize, until they no longer have it.

2. I wish I didn't work so hard.

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children's youth and their partner's companionship. Women also spoke of

this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply

regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by

creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became

who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.

We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly,

in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your

life. Either way, you win.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realize the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down.

Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets

about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details

of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true

importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to

ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and

relationships.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and

habits. The so-called 'comfort' of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them

pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their

life again.

When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long

before you are dying.

Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happiness.

Bronnie Ware is a writer, singer/songwriter, songwriting teacher and speaker from Australia. She has lived nomadically for most of her adult

life. Bronnie shares her inspiring observations and the insights gained along the way through the diversity of her work.

Ayesha Gaddafi daughter of the late president Muammar Gaddafi spam scam

Subject: Greetings
Sent by: Ayesha Gaddafi
Sent Via Email: ayeshagaddafi@gmail.com
Determination: Scam Phishing attempt

Greetings,

My name is Ayesha Gaddafi am the only daughter late president Muammar Gaddafi, who ruled Libya from 1969 to 2011. During the period of his stay in office, he made me go into money exchange and gold business but due to the up rising/crisis in libya now he died a careless death as a result of that i made a bold decission that i was going to leave the country so that i will not fall a victim like my father did because the way things are going on,no body is safe.

However before the death of my father he deposited $20 million to a bank in London Uk, which i will provide you with the contact information. And also as people were evacuating the country i packaged 85 kilogram of Gold in an italian safe as a mattar of fact i saw a UNITED NATION humaniterian aid worker he was going to London UK and i secure the two boxes on his care but i did not disclose the original content of box to him.I asked him to help me to convey the boxes to his country in the United Kingdom,i told him that the content of the boxes is my father's properties documents both home and abroad,i told him to help me secure it till my country is calm then i will give him instruction on that,so he to issue to me the certificate of ownership of the boxes with my name which i will forward to you for the collections of the boxes because he said that whoever that is coming to claim it should present the ownership certificate that was our agreement.

As i was making searching in the internet i got your email address and i said to my self that i was going to do busines with you in your country. i am happy the diplomat had now arrived to London safely with my frist son and he has called me and i told him that somebody will call him about the boxes i gave him and he said no problem that my boxes are safe and i am free any time for it.

Having gone through my mail massage i will like us to work together in your country with the money US$20 Million so if you have accepted with me then get back to me with your full name,your country of origin,your age and sex,your private telephone number,your current occupation and lastly any of your valid identification card.

with all this it will enable us to proceed and please remember not to disclose this to any body for security reasons,If you have accepted then i will give you the contact to contact the Diplomat for the boxes of gold and the contact information of the bank were the money is been deposited in United Kingdom and as soon as every thing is concluded i will fly to your country to settle down there for the rest of my life and we will invest the money and sale the gold. Waiting to hear from you as it will enable me to stop searching for another helper.

Best Regard
Ayesha Gaddafi
only daughter late president Muammar Gaddafi From Benghazi Libya.

Satellite TV from $24.99/mo.Free Installation and HD DVR spam email scam

Sent by: WebOnly
Sent Via Email: webonly6@cmfiction.com
Determination: Scam spammers looking to fool spam software with nonsensical gibberish and this was sent to a harvested email address without my permission. Remember to never support spammers!

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" "Already arisen!" repeated Mr. Bennet. "What, has she frightened away some of your lovers? Poor little Lizzy! But do not be cast down. Such squeamish youths as cannot bear to be connected with a little absurdity, are not worth a regret. Come, let me see the list of the pitiful fellows who have been kept aloof by Lydia's folly." "Indeed you are mistaken. I have no such injuries to resent. It is not of peculiar, but of general evils, which I am now complaining. Our importance, our respectability in the world, must be affected by the wild volatility, the assurance and disdain of all restraint which mark Lydia's character. Excuse me-for I must speak plainly. If you, my_dearfather, will not take the trouble of checking her exuberant spirits, and of teaching her that her present pursuits are not to be the business of her life, she will soon be beyond the reach of amendment. Her character will be fixed, and she will, at sixteen, be the most determined flirt that ever made herself and her family ridiculous. A flirt too, in the worst and meanest degree of flirtation; without any attraction beyond youth and a tolerable person; and from the ignorance and emptiness of her mind, wholly unable to ward off any portion of that universal contempt which her rage for admiration will excite.

If you do not wish to receive future promotional emails, visit here to change your subscription settings Please Follow here to manager your online status. All requests are handled promptly and privately. Or Write: PO Box 18484 San Jose Ave City Of Industry, CA, 91748, US

Below is a real legit Satellite TV offer

Contract Award Committee email spam scam by Natasha Raymond

Sent By: Natasha Raymond
Sent Via Email: natasharay96@live.com
Determination: Never contact those impostors

Hi,

I am one of the hardworking Americans that made their money in a cool way. My name is Natasha Raymond from Seattle, WA, though I'm thinking of relocating since I am now rich. I'm one of those who took part in the Nigerian contract many years ago and never got paid, I sent out over $42,000 in payments while in the US, trying to get my payment but it did not come through.

Before I decided to travel down to Africa with all my contract documents, and I was directed to meet an attorney in person of Mr. Napoleon Udeh, who happens to be a member of the CONTRACT AWARD COMMITTEE, he explained everything to me, and made me understand that most people contacting us through emails with promises are all fakes.

He accompanied me to the paying bank for the claim of my contract payment after assisting me in getting all the paper works needed. My Contract payment worth $7,500,000.00 was directly deposited into my bank account in Seattle WA. Moreover, Mr. Napoleon Udeh showed me the full information of those that are yet to receive their payments and I saw your email address as one of the beneficiaries, for this reason, I will ask you to stop dealing with those people sending you false emails, they are not with your fund, they are only making money out of you. I will advise you to contact Mr. Napoleon Udeh today for your own good.

You have to contact him directly on this information below.

CONTRACT AWARD COMMITTEE

Name: Mr. Napoleon Udeh
Email: legal@contractawardcommittee.com
Phone: +234-809-073-2707

The only money I paid him after we met was just $270 for the paper works, take note of that.

I will advise you to contact Mr. Napoleon Udeh so he can help you to recover your overdue payment the same way he assisted me. Instead of dealing with those liars that will be turning you around asking for different kind of money to complete your transaction.

Thank You and Be Blessed.

Mrs. Natasha Raymond.
Seattle, WA, 98101 USA.

New Wine for Seniors - joke

A single glass at night could mean a peaceful, uninterrupted nights sleep. I kid you not.

California vintners in the Napa Valley area,which primarily produce Pinot Blanc, Pinot Noir, and Pinot Grigio wines, have developed a new hybrid grape that acts as an anti-diuretic.

It is expected to reduce the number of trips older people have to make to the bathroom during the night.

The new wine will be marketed as PINO MORE

Thought I would share this as I HEARD IT THROUGH THE GRAPEVINE!!

Subject: Work Opportunity - Application Status Pending - scam job offer

Subject: Work Opportunity - Application Status Pending
Sent Via: Rock Cruit Management
Sent Via Email:apextrans.chinfo@apextrans.ch
Determination: Total scam. I never submitted anything to anyone so the email starts off with a lie. Perfect way to charge you for providing nothing AND to ask for your personal information and social security number for identity theft to scam you!

Hello (my harvested email name)

Thank you for submitting your information for potential employment opportunities.
We look forward to reviewing your application,
but can not do so until you complete our internal application.

The pay range for available positions range from $35.77 per hour to $57.62 per hour.
Prior to begin able to be considered, you will first need you to formally apply.
Please go here to begin the process:

http://widg.me/3sXOZ

Also, the following perks are potentially available:

- Paid Time Off
- Health Benefits Package
- Higher than average salaries
- Tuition Reimbursement
- Extensive 401(k)program

Please take the time to follow the directions and complete the entire application process.

*******************

Best Regards,

Rock Cruit Management

Now these people below are legit and NOT a scam - MyCrapMail.com