My nightmare of being a victim of credit card fraud.

Imagine my shock today when one of my credit cards was declined! I was way under my limit and I never pay my bills late and yet – I couldn’t pay for my propane with this worthless piece of plastic.

I called my credit card company and after waiting on hold for more than 1/2 hour I learned my account was closed due to massive fraudulent activities overseas. I hung up the phone in shock.

How could this happen to me? I shred or burn personal papers, I lock down everything personal, I have no less than 4 virus programs and 5 spyware programs running on all of my computers at all times, I scan everything carefully before I open it. How could this happen TO ME?

Since this is a card that I have never used online – I barely use it at all; my accounting program in my computer must have been hacked! Damage control – what do I do!

I gathered all of my account information and started calling banks, brokerage houses and credit cards telling my tales of woe changing accounts and locking everything I could down. Hours and hours wasted and no more fraud found.

All of my personal data is password protected and all of my accounts have different unguessable passwords. What about my other data on my hard drive? How deep would this identity theft go?

But wait! I don’t have my CIV numbers anywhere but on the credit card itself! I never used this card online so how can so many charges be made? I have to call the credit card company again!

15 minutes on hold and the fraud department tells me that a vendor who I used the card with had a security breach - they were responsible for the loss of data not me! Boy was I relived – although I wasted a day – or did I?

What I did find was recorded instances of my social security number in correspondences saved on my hard drive (now removed) and I put all of my account numbers into my accounting program - they are now all removed.

I also realized that in some cases my identity as the owner of an account was verified with my birth date and mothers maiden name – what a huge – immense security issue!

I have spent the rest of the day changing birth dates on social media sites such as MySpace, Facebook and more to a fictitious date. There is no reason for personal information such as this to be accessible by the world and whatever skivemeisters want to hack me.

How many of you have grandparents online or a family tree somewhere that can be found? How many of you grandparents have your kids online? What about the future?

Why does the clerk at my cellphone company have the right to know my last 4 digits of my social security number along with dozens of other underpaid people? Birth date and last 4 of my social gave me access to all of my other accounts. This is insane!

I have also deleted my profile from many places and will keep doing so until almost all of them are gone. I don’t want more web sites to have my personal information that can be used against me. Though these sites may have good intentions what if they get hacked? Will they pay me for the time it takes to lock down and change all of my clients information and they trust that they will lose in me?

As for friends on social sites: I generally don’t respond to any 3rd party applications (programs that are add-ins) and "causes" - Do you really know who these people are? Are you sure they represent the organization they say they are from and what if they and real and THEY get hacked? I am removing these also as quickly as I can. I suggest anyone who reads this does as well.

We live in a totally connected world and that’s great. I just don’t want to be connected to criminals or cyber-terrorists and neither should you.

Chris H
Owner of MyCrapMail.com and tons of other crappy sites

Guessing a Woman's Age - joke

A woman decides to have a face lift for her 50th birthday.

She spends $15,000 and feels pretty good about the results.

On her way home, she stops at a newsstand to buy a newspaper.

Before leaving, she says to the clerk, 'I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?'

'About 32,' is the reply.'

'Nope! I'm exactly 50,' the woman says happily.

A little while later she goes into McDonald's and asks the counter girl the very same question.

The girl replies, 'I'd guess about 29.'

The woman replies with a big smile, 'Nope, I'm 50.'

Now she's feeling really good about herself. She stops in a drug store on her way down the street.

She goes up to the counter to get some mints and asks the clerk this burning question.

The clerk responds, 'Oh, I'd say 30.'

Again she proudly responds, 'I'm 50, but thank you!'

While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man waiting next to her the same question.

He replies, 'Lady, I'm 78 and my eyesight is going. Although, when I was young there was a sure-fire way to tell how old a woman was.

It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra.

Then, and only then can I tell you EXACTLY how old you are.'

They wait in silence on the empty street until her curiosity gets the best of her.

She finally blurts out, 'What the hell, go ahead.'

He slips both of his hands under her blouse and begins to feel around very slowly and carefully.

He bounces and weighs each breast and he gently pinches each nipple.

He pushes her breasts together and rubs them against each other.

After a couple of minutes of this, she says, 'Okay, okay....How old am I?'

He completes one last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands, and says, 'Madam, you are 50.'

Stunned and amazed, the woman says, 'That was incredible, how could you tell?'

The old man says, 'Promise you won't get mad?'

'I promise I won't' she says.

'I was behind you at McDonalds'.