The Old Cowboy and the lesbian in Starbucks

Ya think you have lived to be 71 and know who you are, then along comes someone and blows it all to the dickens.

The old cowboy sat down at the Starbucks and ordered a cup of coffee. As he sat sipping his coffee, a pretty young woman sat down next to him..

She turned to the cowboy and asked, 'Are you a real cowboy?'

He replied, 'Well, I've spent my whole life breaking colts, working cattle, going to rodeos, fixing fences, pulling calves, bailing hay, doctoring calves, cleaning my barn, fixing flats, working on tractors, and feeding my dogs, so I guess I am a cowboy.'

She said, 'I'm a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about naked women. As soon as I get up in the morning, I think about naked women. When I shower, I think about naked women. When I watch TV, I think about naked women. It seems everything makes me think of naked women.'

The two sat sipping their coffee in silence.

A little while later, a man sat down on the other side of the old cowboy and asked, 'Are you a real cowboy?'

The old man replied, 'I always thought I was, but I just found out I'm a lesbian.'

Irish Coffee - joke

An Irish woman of advanced age visited her physician to seek his help in reviving her husband's libido.

'What about trying Viagra? Asks the doctor.

'Not a chance,' she said. 'He won't even take an aspirin.'

'Not a problem,' replied the doctor. 'Give him an Irish Soluble Viagra.

Drop it into his coffee. He won't even taste it. Give it a try and call me in a week to let me know how things went.'

It wasn't a week later that she called the doctor, who directly inquired as to progress. The poor dear exclaimed, 'Oh, faith, bejaysus and begorrah! 'Twas horrid. Just terrible doctor!.'

'Really? What happened?' asked the doctor?'

'Well, I did as you advised and slipped it in his coffee and the effect was almost immediate. He jumped his self straight up, with a twinkle in his eye, and with his pants a-bulgin' fiercely! With one swoop of his arm, he sent the cups and tablecloth flyin', ripped me clothes to tatters and took me then and there, making wild, mad, passionate love to me on the table-top!

It was a nightmare, I tell you, an absolute feckin' nightmare!'

'Why so terrible?' asked the doctor, 'Do you mean the sex your husband provided wasn't good'?

'Oh, no, no, no, doctor, the sex was fine indeed! 'Twas the best sex I've had in 50 years of marriage! But sure as I'm sittin' here, I'll never be able to show me face in Starbucks again!'