Boobs vs. Willies

A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, 'Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?'

The father, surprised, answers, 'Well, son, a woman goes through three phases. In her 20s, a woman's boobs are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s to 40s, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions'. 'Onions?'

'Yes, you see them and they make you cry.'

This infuriated his wife and daughter, so the daughter said, 'Mom, how many kinds of 'willies' are there?'

The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, 'Well dear, a man goes through three phases also. In his 20s, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his 30s and 40s, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his 50s, it is like a Christmas tree'.

'A Christmas tree?' 'Yes --- dead from the root up and the balls are just for decoration.'

Guts or Balls - joke

There is a medical distinction. We have all heard all heard about people having guts or balls, but do you really know the difference between them?

In an effort to keep you informed, the definitions are listed below.

A husband is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being met by his wife with a broom, and having the guts to ask: 'Are you still cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?'

Another husband is coming home late after a night out with the guys, smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the butt and having the balls to say: 'You're next, fatty.'

I hope this clears up any confusion on the definitions. Medically speaking, there is no difference in the outcome, since both ultimately result in death.

Guts or Balls: Medical Distinctions - Joke

We've all heard about people having guts or balls, but do you really know the difference between them?

In an effort to keep you informed, the definition for each is listed below:

GUTS - is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being met by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to ask:

"Are you still cleaning, or are you flying somewhere?"

BALLS - is coming home late after a night out with the guys, smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the butt and having the balls to say: "You're Next."

I hope this clears up any confusion on the definitions. Medically speaking, there is no difference in the outcome, since both ultimately result in death.